To assume that sexuality is entirely about sex is a common mistake that we can undo for you in just 500 words or fewer if it’s a misbelief you’ve fallen for too. The fact is, sexuality is so much more than how sexy you feel or how much sex you’re having. But human sexuality is the way in which we all experience and express ourselves sexually, and this self-expression can appear in biological, psychological, physical, erotic, emotional, social, or spiritual feelings and behaviors.
Clearly, sexuality is a broad concept that covers much more than just the sensual stuff, and that’s because our sexuality encompasses and informs our identity, sexual orientation, gender roles, personality, feelings, and relationships. So, getting in touch with your sexuality isn’t all about setting the mood or getting done up for the club. Really, embracing your sexuality is about getting back in touch with yourself.
So, let’s get you back on the road to yourself and build a healthy relationship with your sexuality by following these simple tips. Trust us. The more you can embrace yourself and sexuality to the fullest, the more you can enjoy life in its full color, so read on:
1. Notice your feelings of discomfort or shame.
There’s no need to pretend that talking about sex or expressing your desires makes you feel weird or even shameful. Instead, start paying closer attention to these negative feelings and see if you can trace that shame back to where it began.
Understanding yourself—the good and the bad—is key to embracing your sexuality to the fullest, so don’t be afraid to pull up your sleeves and get your hands dirty.
2. Find solidarity and direction in other people’s stories or ideas.
If learning about sexuality or yourself in this way is new to you, then it might help you to explore what someone else has to say about the matter.
The good news is that there are so many books, articles, and other resources out there from unique perspectives that you might relate to, so do some research and discover what sexuality means to you by diving deeper into topics on pleasure, desire, or sex.
3. Do more of what feels good.
This sounds simple, and that’s because it is. Get into the habit of asking yourself more often what feels good to you, and then do more of that thing!
Whether it’s moving your body, wearing that special outfit, or arousing yourself through touch, don’t be afraid to give into pleasure more often. It’s all a part of the human experience, baby.
4. Focus on the present.
In order to know what feels good and to find intimacy in everyday life, you need to be in the moment and aware of your experience. So cue the mindfulness exercises.
Awareness can bring you back to your core and give you the chance to realize your desires, so when in doubt, sit back and be one with what’s right in front of you.
Written by Reese Williams.
Reese is a full-time freelance copywriter and a part-time plant mom, cook, and thrift shop regular. When she’s not caring for her plant babies or cooking up a new dish she found on TikTok, you’ll usually find her online at fiverr.